"My sharings and testimonial shared"

Continued with the previous Mission trip。。。。
I shared my testimonial that night in the Hokkien service for the mission trip.

Here sounds my brief testimonial for being a Christian.
When i was young, i used to go the church following my grandmother. I could be considered as a non-christian even i used to go to Sunday school. I still remembered that the teachers used to tell me the stories in bible. I just listened till i grew up. Until there was time due to my family's reasons, i didn't go to church for a long time.

Until the time when i was year six i think, i went back to the church again. Yet, i still not knowing much regarding Christ. i continued to have missing days for church. I was undergoing the really blur as so called "Christian" life during that time.

The situation continued until i was in Form 2. I still remembered that my church's pastor couple came to visit me that day because i didn't go to the church for quite a long time. She came and told me all over again what the "good news" was about, redemption of Jesus Christ, the plans of Lord on us, and how HE died for us and revived. That day, i really had the clear picture of what a Christian is all about. Then, i admitted my sins and made the prayer to accept Jesus Christ with her that evening. See, i just like the missing sheep without the shepherd during that time. But, Lord never give up on me. HE still accept me after all and continued his own plans on me.

The followings were my sharing regarding my experiences with Lord.
However, upon becoming a Christian doesn't means that you will have an happy, easy life after that like in fairy tales. The real life hardships and trials then started to stuck on me. The prayers i made sometimes could work instantly and mostly not so.

The biggest hardship i even faced so far was that the incident of my deceased earthly father. I still remembered very freshly the period where i finished my PMR exam. My father had been sick due to cardiovascular problems for so many years and used to work out station and only managed to come back once a month. At that time, my father was really ill and had to rest in my home.

I remembered that how he suffered due to unable to breathe smoothly, unable to sleep for most of the nights, frustrated and groaned, how he was unable to lie down and slept and only managed to sit there to sleep.

I was there with him to give him medicines and accompanied him, chatted with him the nights as to relieve his pain and sufferings. I frustrated, could do nothing and only could see him suffering, cried and the feeling was simply just unexpressable. I used to pray to Lord so that he could relieved from his suffering and pain at that time and used to force my father to say the prayer words together with me as he was not a believer. And, my father was willing to pray sincerely and admitted his sin during that periods too. Bro and Sis in church also got cam eto pray for him. But, Lord seemed not to hear the prayer and i used to blame HIM too. I just didn't know why HE seemed didn't listen to my prayer at that time.

The conditions didn't become better and continued till i was Form 5 few months before SPM. I still remembered very clearly that day was Dragon Boat Festival or "Duan Wu" festival on 22th June 2004, i received a phone from Kuching there that telling us that my father had fainted and passed away just like that on his constuction site in his Ford Ranger car at the time. I hardly could believe what i heard and stood there for few moments. I not even there to see him for the last moment. My mom was with him at that time. I wondered how my mom could deal with all that and she had the really hard, devasted moment.

I just didn't understand why it must be so and being sad for quite a long periods of time. I simply just didn't know how our family could continue our life after that. As my father was the sole breadwinner, and left nothing except a house, no insurance, no SOSCO, no EPF, 3 younger sisters with the youngest at the age of 10 year-old with us. Yet, i didn't blame Lord and able to accept it gradually. Surprisingly, i had strong will and peace deep inside me as not to tense up, and wanted me to wait for Lord at that time. Of course, we had a really tough and sad time together. The bro and sis in Christ also really had helped us a lot during that time. The following verse helped me a lot.

以赛亚书 40:31
“但那等候耶和华的人，必重新得力；
他们比如鹰展翅展翅；
他们奔跑却不困倦，
行走却不疲乏。”

Then, Lord has guided and led us through for our following years by years. The amazing grace and love of Lord filled us in every aspects of our life. Thankful to Lord that my whole family are the believers and all my sister are passion with Lord and having services in church now. The amazing grace of Lord is flourishing and sufficient for our life dealings everyday.

Back to see what Lord had on my own self, Lord had His own planning for everything He gave me no matter it was good or bad. He took away my father as to relieve his pain after so many years.

罗马书8：28
“我们晓得万事互相效力，
叫爱神的人得益处，
就是按祂旨意被召的人。”

Like the verse of Romans 8:28 said "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

Lord has given me such trials in life as to sharpen me, to train me to become tough, able to deal with life, ever growing, love and passion in Christ more and more.

After sharing a so called not a good experience, i would like to share one of my amazing experiences with Lord.

Once, i was working as a clerk in church after having my STPM exam while waiting for the release of results. At that time, all my family's member had been busy for working and studying, we didn't ever had the time to go to supermarket to buy our towels at the time we were running out of supply in our home. Surprisingly, soon after we just realised, i was being provided immediately the next day. The next day i came to work, my pastor asked me that, "Nian Zhen, there are lots of new, unused towels in the sunday's school's room, do your family needs that?"

I suprisingly stared at her for few seconds. See, Lord know what we need everyday whether it is great or even small need in our life. And, HE has supplied my need even though i haven't pray and asked for it. Although this event maybe seems like very small part in my life, i could only said that Lord is justice and would took care of us. When we able to count the grace of God on us, we surely will be amazed by HIS grace and the moments HE is with us.

马太福音6：26
“你们看那天上的鸟，也不种，也不收，也不积蓄在仓里，你们的天父尚且养活它。你们不比飞鸟贵重的多么？”

As the verse in verse 6:26 in Matthew said,"Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?"

I must say that we should have faith in Lord that He will take very good care of us as long as we're willing to surrender ourself to HIM. I hope that i would continued to have faithful footprint in HIM and walked together with HIM to deal my coming challenges and obstacles in life.

Thanks Lord again for me to be able to share my testimonial during that mission trip. ^.^

Diaries of Mission Trip to Pengkalan Hulu and Pulau Banding.

I had been in a mission trip to Pengkalan Hulu and Pulau Banding for few days. It really a good experience for me and all the member of this mission trip. I had been there for the second times already. I decided to go there at almost the last moment because the strong feeling in my heart kept urged me “You got to see more”. Therefore, I was there just by faith without knowing what I need to do for this mission. Thanks to Lord as I managed to contribute some by sharing and involved in Sunday school with the native kids there.

Yet, i‘m not regret for going there, because I really bring back something priceless, invaluable deep down in my heart. Thanks to Lord for making us to be able to complete this mission finally.

Pastor Loh, a pastor there is committed to lots of services like Hokkien, Cantonese, Bahasa and even had services in the Pulau Banding for the natives there. She really tough, compassionate, loyal and very capable yet faithful server of Lord. She alone needs to handle all the services without any helpers. It really not easy to handle all these alone and we found it hard and even trembled though we have 21 members in this mission for only this few days.

The Cantonese service started a while after we arrived...
27/2 - The night we reached there and directly involved in the Cantonese Service without having any dinner. I managed to talk with a Thai Chinese grandma of 62 years old yet she looked like only 50++. She told me that all her sons and daughters worked in KL and Singapore. She was living there with her husband of 70++ and she still fit enough to tape for rubber as from 3am to 10am daily. She said that she had nothing to do if she didn’t tape for rubber. Her family only managed to come and visited her once every year during CNY. I asked her whether she called to them very often and she seldom doing so. She didn’t has anyone to communicate or speak to her. So, she would just spend her leisure time to watch tv and sleep at the time as early as 8.30pm. I wonder if I would be having no one to talk to when I’m old.

The Thai Chinese grandma sit beside me ^.^

After the Cantonese service, we only managed to have our dinner by the time almost ten I think in a Malay restaurant. I considered the food there fair taste only. My friend, Grace kept mumbling and complaining me that night that she also wanted to be like me next time as I participated at the last moment and not doing anything or preparations for all the tasks. She needed to share and involved in sketch.
Our delicious dinner as late as 10pm that nite... ^.^

That night, I really had a strong desire deep in my heart to write out my testimonial to share. Then, I picked up my mechanical pencil and try to work out with my things until 3am. I told Grace I wished to share and she decided to let me to share after her sharing.

28/2 – I managed to wake up by 6am and only had a 3 hours sleep. Then, I helped out in the Kitchen with Richard and Steven to prepare the breakfast. We’re having the devotion time together by 7.30am. After having devotion and breakfast, we prepared to go to Pulau Banding.

Then I committed to the duty of driving the van to Pulau Banding by Joshua P and then fetched the people went and back to Pulau Banding. The road was really not easy for driving since it had hills, needed to climb up and down along the way. This was really an energy consuming task! Then, we took boats to the two settlements or islands. The two settlements of the natives really had improved a lot as compared to last time when we were there. There got a clean water supply of pipe from hills already at the first settlement. The natives there also have nicer look or more cleaner as compared to the first time I saw them. Then, we chatted, performed some singings and sketchs for them to bring up the message of the love of God.

Heading to Pulau Banding...
Arrived there and started to greet natives there...
A sleepy baby on the back of her mom... ^.^


Hooi Keng and i managed to share the stories of Jesus to them...
Having singings together... ^.^
Able to have a group pic when we reached d jetty.. ^.^

At the night, I was in the package of “Hokkien service” in Baling at the same time there was another youth service at Pengkalan Hulu. I was quite nervous because I needed to share my testimonial. I prayed to Lord to gave me strength to be able to share my experiences with Lord without any strong emotions. And I managed my emotion and able to share smoothly. I didn’t know how others felt but I tried to open up myself sincerely and truly that night.

At the night time, Zhi Ling, Joshua P and I prepared the script of story-telling for the children for the next morning until very late. We had lots of fun and laughed too during the preparation. Again, I only managed to sleep for a very short time.

1/3 – We had the Bahasa service in that morning. We didn’t have our devotion since all of us were so rushing and started to set up everything for the service. After the sermon, praise and worship, we in-charged for the Sunday school for the children there. After having some singings, I read up the story of “Yunus (Jonah)” for them and the others acted for the story. Then, we had a Q&A session and treated them with candy and chocolate.

After that, I led them a song with actions. They turned the rounds for “Datuk Nenek” until dizzy. They seemed enjoyed the song very much. We had a really wonderful time with the children. The children were really obedient and happy yet didn’t make much noise as compared to the town kids. I called my friend in Sabah to recall back for that song. The song is like following:

Tuhan Cinta:
“Anak-anak kecil, Tuhan cinta,
Anak-anak besar, Tuhan cinta,
Pemuda-pemudi, Tuhan cinta,
Ibu bapa, Datuk Nenek, Datuk Nenek
Datuk Nenek, Datuk Nenek, Datuk Nenek,
Tuhan cinta.”

It's really a simple song that bring up the message of the love of God for everyone.
Then, we packed our luggages and went to a lake garden to have the sharing together before we left there. After the sharing, we started to move and had the lunch at the famous duck rice at Kulim there.
Managed to chat with few youths here.. ^.^
Yeah yeah... My "peace group" members in Chinese cell group..
I'm proud of u guy... hehe..^_^

This time, feel a bit disappointed because I didn’t have much time to meet the congregation in Pengkalan Hulu since I involved in Service in Pulau Banding, “Hokkien Service” in Baling and “Sunday School”.

having all the happy mission member here....^.^
YEah... Heading to Kulim to mum mum famous duck rice....^.^

Hope that everyone really bring back invaluable lessons from this mission.

Thanks again to Lord for leading us throughout the mission trip.

"WHO AM I'

The scene of that night

Yesterday night, our campus had an evangelistic concert with the theme "Who Am I" from the combination of CUS(Catholic fellowship), CF(Christian Fellowship) and Da Zhuan(Undergraduate fellowship). This could only been held after 3 years and it really a great concert. We had worship and praise, mime, dance, 3 testimonial sharing... I had been involved in the choir part. So, all of us had been busy for preparation works. Thankful to Lord for all the bro and sis in Christ in different races and languages that gather because of the love of God. And because of HIS love, we're able to make it. Hallelujah...

The dance...

The CUS guys...

The congregation that night.....

Thanks to Lord... My lovely sisters do come that night...

It's me... hehe ^.^

Back to the theme, who am i actually?

I may not be good or perfect, find it hard to express myself, not a good speaker, not even humorous, not very good in academic or sports or in languages, has really limited knowledges in Bibles and general knowledges, not having good look either,or just an unperfect puzzle with so many missing pieces.

But, i know that God do love me so much and i'm the daughter of my heavenly father. I maybe had experienced more tough things in my life than most of those as for my age. Sometimes, i felt it unfair for me to undergo so much and why others didn't go through what i was. But, i kept reminding myself that Lord was the one who gave me life and taking control of my life, He wanted me to grow from every tough or easy tasks/plans He has given me.

I would not say that Lord is the only missing piece, rather without Him, we would have so many missing pieces for the puzzle. As long as we found Him, He would fill up every missing pieces one by one together with Him until we meet Him in the heaven.

Thanks Lord again for making me grow from all these.

The Power of "BUSY"

The word " busy" is what an easy word we always used especially to reject things come upon you from others or to make an excuse for yourself.

Sometime, we keep telling people that we are busy and in fact we are not so. People like to make an excuse in many things. Maybe sometime i am afraid of facing some tasks then i choose to use the word "busy" for myself and to reject others. Then maybe i can free of all the troubles. Or, it simply just an act of irresponsible.

Frequently, i found that i really don't know what i am busy of. But sometimes, i really become helpless due to the real busy that i has trembled and do not know where to start to finish the things..

BUSY,

it makes you feel tired..

it makes you trembled..

it makes you blanked..

it makes you feel dizzy..

it makes you helpless..

it makes you sick..

it somehow makes you away from your lovely Lord..

it somehow makes you away from your loved one..

it somehow makes you careless..

especially in caring others..

Dear Lord,

I pray that i can be close with and may spend my pleasure time with you though i'm busy. I pray that i may not forget the others and try to care them too. I pray that i may always keep in touch with my family and my friends. I prayed that i may take a deep breath from the breathless tasks and enjoy the "pause" moment with you.

It's the 1st day of Chinese New Year!!

Having the pic together with the big family (2 family) during their family gathering on CNY eve.

Since i'm not going back to my hometown Sibu again this year, I go to KL to celebrate with my friend, Nga Ming which has not been seen for a really long period of time.

Thanks God for preparing me a place to stay that is in Nga Ming's uncle house. Thanks to the kind hosts, too for letting me to enjoy this special season with them. It's such a great time together with the whole family, Nga Ming's uncle and his wife, their four cute children,children's grandma and two Nga Ming's cousins.

Yesterday, i witnessed how the amazing God blessed a big family and leading them in the grace of the Almighty Lord. My friend's uncle is an engineer and dealing with software engineering and her aunty once was a teacher and now helping her husband, an engineer that owned a software company. All of them origined from Sarawak and are the faithful Christian yet very successful adults. They used to gather together very often and have very close relationship. Then, i'm thinking of how good if our relationship with relatives can also be like that too.

My friend, Nga Ming has three relatives staying here in KL, her two uncles and her aunty, all of them are really been blessed. Her uncle David is a very faithful follower who has been undergone a bone marrow transplant and his wife is a teacher. The family is blessed with four lovely children. Their life are simple and happy.

I never seen a husband will help his wife to make a home recipe together and it's such a warm scene seeing the whole family having the fun time together. At the moment, i missed my family too.


I hope that God will keep blessing this big family and accompany them all the time. God really will bless those who is believing, loving and following HIM. My friend is really blessed and lucky too. :)

My friend, Nga Ming, me and her two little cute cousins

Ladies' pic, From left - Anna, Nga Ming's cousin, her aunty, her uncle's wife and me ^.^

Homesick season..>w<

This few days I really feel homesick especially during this CNY celebration. I can’t even concentrate in lectures and doing things well. I really wanted to celebrate together with my family in Sibu eagerly. Early in the morning, I on my laptop and started to access to the flight pages to check available cheap flight during the festival after my first opening of eyes. Yet, I failed to do so...

Haiz… feeling rather sad.I could only blamed and regreted for not booking the flight earlier and now its' price already been rose so highly. All of these are going to point back to that “sucking blood” flight company—MXX and Axx Axxx. They have to take these festivals’ advantages in order to a earn a fortune so they raise the flight’s fare so “irrationally”. They should consider that those the undergraduates like me from oversea (South China Sea >o<), Sarawak which is studying in Penang will be unaffordable to pay the costly flight during festival since we just take ptptn or a tightly spendable scholarship and mostly not come from rich family.

Another thing, i noticed that whatever flights to Sibu always more expensive than to the other places and I just don’t know why it is so. It costs us 1000++ for a trip from Penang to my hometown for just a week time. Come on, the money definitely can be used maybe for almost one and a half months of life expenses as a student. I wonder there must be a lot of students like me. They must have been sobbing quietly and thinking of their family so much during the festival.

I plan to write to Axx Axxx blog there in some days to share my feeling of being unable to go back during festival and maybe this is how the others feel too. Why don’t they give some special offers to the unaffordable undergraduates so that they will be able to be with their family during this lovely festival. Isn’t it helping those who are in needing is a blessed deeds? They will feel satisfy and happy too in doing so, right? I think I has thought too much, it kinds like an “impossible missions”. Maybe I’m just so sick of home.

When the CNY song being heard, it’s rather sad because it keeps reminding me that I’m unable to go home to be with my family. And, people might think that I don’t miss my family at all. They wouldn’t be able to know my complicated feelings since they don’t know me. But, as long as I clearly know what I really think of and could do for my family sincerely, that’s enough already.

I missed the moments of being together with my family for all kinds of festivals. I missed my mum, my sis and my bro. The pictures of how all my siblings of six including me were having fun together when we’re young freshly appeared in my mind.

We used to play the firecrackers together and watching the entire beautiful firecracker works that could only been seen in my hometown. The scene was when it reached 12 midnight of new year eve, almost every home started their firecrackers works and the “Pi Li Pa La” sound could be heard so loudly just like my hometown was being bombed and even could be described as an earthquake till 1am. The scene definitely couldn’t be seen anywhere here. It was just so merry and fun.

I still remember that I used to bake all the festival’s biscuits and cakes at home till the midnight of eve. I even had the sense of satisfactory after looking my friends and relatives enjoyed my “victory product” and could treat them with my own made desserts.

However, it was really blessed when I looked back as I was here as a second year undergraduate in USM taking up the Engineering course which I was not interested as I was I think. HE really has put on beautiful and challenging plans in my life as he will prepare things I needed and I has great faith in HIM. From the beginning of my university’s life till now, I wouldn’t be able to be here without HIM. I thought that I’m unaffordable to do so base on my family’s financial situation as my mom is a single mom. But, HE’s guiding me step by step and provides me with scholarship to support my life expenses. Till now, I’m still so fit and healthy protected under the shelter of my heavenly father.

Thanks, Father in heaven. Thanks for providing everything I need and take good care of my family in hometown too. Wish that I will grow in whatever aspects day by day in the way of Jesus Christ.

"Temptation vs Trial"

Recently, I has mixed up the word "temptation" and "trial". Temptation means that you yourself, your evil desires tend to make you fall into sin. While trial is what God think it's good for you to make you grow but it might make you fall and lost your faith in Lord.

Just take an easy example here like maybe your friend passed the answer sheet to you during a test then you can choose either to or not to grab it. If you choose to copy the answer, that means your evil desire, the tempatation make you fall into the trap. (You may refer to the verse Jacob 1:13-15). Lord keep training you from trials so that you can have strong faith and trust in Lord.

That's the power of words and languages. It often make you clearer about a thing and even may cause you to misunderstood sometimes. That why we need to extremely be careful especially in reading God's words. It's not easy for the people who translated bible from one language to another. God got said that the people who preach need to take greater responsibilty than the people who listen to the preach.

So, we gonna be extremely careful in this ya... ^.^